SONG RELEASE STORY
May 26, 2023
The psychedelic, rock track began its creation in summer 2022. I took my tarot cards with me to the studio, for my bi-weekly meeting with Brian. For this song, he would draw the card and create the music first, after which I would write the lyrics and sing the vocals. I lined up my six decks and asked him to select his favorite. I instructed him to shuffle the cards and then draw one. He pulled the Six of Wands. We looked at the card and tried to imagine it's meaning before referencing my books. It was a card of victory, achievement, and the feeling of pride after the battle is over. "Will this card work for you?" I asked Brian. He did a sideways nod, looked to the ceiling, and said, "I think so."
Brian sent me a first version track a few weeks later. I got to work by importing it into my recording software and took a first listen. It was rock, with an edge and punch I was not used to. But I was up for the challenge. The first words came to me and I had a mix ready for Brian the following week. I had gotten the title and chorus right, but that was about it. The syllables weren't being sung correctly and the melodies were too forced. Some lyrics were overused metaphors. I was defeated of course, but I kept trying. And then I got stuck. Very, very stuck.
As I worked with a songwriting process that was new to me, my health was declining. The medicine I had been taking to prevent my breast cancer recurrence had been building in my system, and I began having severe mood disturbances. I tried to ignore it, but then I started having concentration issues, and memory problems. Finally, at the end of October, I had lost all interest in songwriting. I told Brian I had to set the song aside for now.
Fast forward to 2023. I was off the medicine and my brain was working a little better. "You've got to get this one done, Lorie, it's so close to finished," Brian told me. I had been re-working the lyrics in my mind for over a month and was now using my own story to shape the song. Was I going to give in to my depression and throw away my talent? Had I lost my mind for the past 6 months? I thought about the unfairness of my life and how making music is all I've ever wanted, but I keep getting held back by health problems. I needed a victory desperately. At last, the lyrics reached me. I wrote about the monsters. I wrote about rejection. I wrote about digging deep. I finished the tracks and sent them to Brian by my promised deadline.
This song was hard to write. It was hard to find. I wrote the majority of the lyrics on Saturday February 25, 2023, and chose that as the song written date. Sometimes victory is easy, and sometimes it's elusive. But it always has an aura, and sometimes, you can even hear it sing.