The Hermit represents wisdom, solitude, and the sharing of spiritual truths that shine a light in the darkness. Guidance may be found from within or from another.
The Hermit represents wisdom, solitude, and the sharing of spiritual truths that shine a light in the darkness. Guidance may be found from within or from another.
February 2, 2024
This is the song that started it all - an avalanche of songs and the beginning of The Music Tarot. To give it justice, I must go back to the beginning, and explain the depths of my solitude.
Fall 2014. An uneventful morning began with my usual routine. But this was no ordinary day. Suddenly, a thought popped into my head, "You are meant to create The Music Tarot." My entire universe shifted. A knowingness settled over me, removing all doubt. I knew this was my purpose. Looking back through my history, The Music Tarot was an obvious calling.
For most of my adult life, I had been trying to make something of myself as a singer-songwriter. I performed gigs and made demos. In 2011, I developed a performance style called, "Music Tarot." I created a deck of cards containing the titles and meanings of my songs. I invited audience members to pick a card at random. Whatever they picked, I played, and dedicated the performance to them. I never pre-planned my sets. It was up to the audience to tell me what to play. My song deck contained originals and covers, but they were not based on traditional tarot cards. The only connection to tarot was the shuffling, drawing, and sharing of a message. I helped people through my songs. I gave them messages of hope and validation, connection and belonging, reassurance and comfort. 2011-2013 was a time of growth, inspiration, sacrifice, and also great challenge.
I was onto something for sure, but I was young and dumb. I made self-absorbed mistakes that hurt me and the ones closest to me. I was in a bitter state and I couldn't keep going. I wondered, maybe I wasn't meant to be a performing artist? Maybe singing and songwriting was just a hobby that had run its course? At the end of 2013, I gave up and threw in the towel. I stopped performing. I stopped songwriting. I stopped playing music altogether.
So on this morning in 2014, almost a year after I had shut the door to it, I was shocked to learn that music wasn't done with me. My previous work had not been done in vain. Music Tarot had only been a stepping stone! Those earlier efforts were pieces of the puzzle, breadcrumbs, leading me to a greater purpose - this large, ambitious body of work. I now knew my purpose, but I wasn't in a rush to begin songwriting again anytime soon. I was at peace to wait, to rest in the quiet, for however long I needed.
My solitude lasted approximately six and a half years. In 2018, armed with a brand new deck of tarot cards, keyboard, microphone, and laptop, I attempted to use a methodical approach, beginning with Card 0, The Fool. I am both right and left brained. I am analytical and artistic. I figured I would start with the Major Arcana and write each card's song until I reached Card XXI, The World. Then I would hit the Minors. But attempt after attempt left me barren. I could see that Fool, standing there on the cliff, but below him, there was nothing. No chords, no vowels, no phrases. I was doing something wrong, but what?
I resumed my solitude, and waited.
And waited.
Summer 2019. An innocent Saturday afternoon lay before me. And then another moment of claircognizance, “You must let the cards decide the songwriting order.”
I told my husband, Miah, what I was going to do. "I'm going to shuffle my deck, pick a card at random, just like I used to do with Music Tarot, and see if I can write that card's song."
"Go for it!" he encouraged me.
I sat quietly in my studio and shuffled my deck for a few minutes as I set my intention. And then I drew The Hermit.
What happened next was nothing short of a miracle. I wrote Solitude To See / The Hermit in a matter of hours. A few weeks later, I pulled another card, and wrote Transformation / Death. Soon after, I wrote Mother's Creation / The Empress. This watershed continued for five months and 15 songs - the most songwriting I had ever done in such a short amount of time. Amazingly, I found my higher self in those years of quiet introspection, and I was bursting with songs. All I had to do was pause, reflect, and listen.